Thursday, May 29, 2008

I would have posted but....

a) I've been so down since American Idol ended that I jumped in an old VW van and hit the road so I could follow the Two Davids around for their press junkets, photo ops and mini-concerts. Oh, and I still don't have a laptop so I can't get online.



b) I have a mysterious and communicable disease which confines me to staying under a plastic bubble (a tarp, really) watching my "stories" on the flat screen and eating Jelly-Belly candy like there's no tomorrow. But not the popcorn flavored ones because those are as gross as Peanut-Butter Cap'n Crunch. Sorry, Cap'n.


This disease gives me bad hair days EVERY DAY and adult onset acne which is really something to boast about.


**FYI: It is not my poor food choices that are contributing to my symptoms, so don't even go there. In fact, if you are going to gently suggest that, please leave my blog immediately. Thank you.



c.) Everything is going great and I have nothing to write about. Except that my dogs have worms. And that doesn't seem like polite conversation. Especially the part where Chopper holds himself up solely on his front legs like a canine gymnast and swings his back legs forward so he can scratch the itch on his doggy nether regions. On the new carpet. Which I am dousing with gasoline a cheaper flammable liquid of some sort and flicking a match and just walking away.


Because, ewww, Chopper. Really, just ewww.




A snippet of each of those choices is true. You'll have to decide which snippets.And I'm out of Jelly Bellys. Please send some ASAP.

Appreciate it.

9 comments:

Michelle said...

Well, whew! And here I was beginning to think something was really wrong.

I'll tell you what Didi, you get your Jelly Belly's and I will get my Gummi Bears and we'll commiserate that adult onset acne together, ok?

Much love,

M

Queen B said...

I wondered where you were...

I hope the communicable disease is over soon.

And the worms.

Especially the worms.

A Christian Mom said...

You poor thing! I hope you feel better soon! Enjoy those Jelly Belly... they are so addicting!

I had a puppy that had worms, earlier in the year. I had never dealt with that before, I was throughly grossed out & sanitized the carpet like crazy! The thought of my girls playing on the carpet... oh man!

His Girl said...

haha. silly post! love it!

Jennifer said...

Ha..Ha..Ha...that was funny. I love funny!!

Put some depends on that doggie and just walk away.

You will have to invest in some Febreeze just in case he has left a lingering scent behind on your lovely new carpet. Silly puppy!

Amy Plumb said...

Glad to see you back posting.

I hate there is nothing on the t.v.; me and my co-worker have nothing to talk about now that AI over.

Sorry to hear about your dog.

Have a great day,
Amy

Cindy-Still His Girl said...

If you can prove that the tarp part of the post is true, I'll send you jelly bellies. And in fact, the popcorn ones are my FAVORITE, so I'll eat all of those for you. You're welcome.

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

I'm cracking up at the poor doggie. It reminds me of the commercial where Toby the dog is scooting across the carpet. Fun post!

E said...

Oh boy, the joy of owning animals! I can hardly wait!