Tuesday, May 13, 2008

"Tell Me Your Story" Testimony Bloggy Carnival!

Hurray!!!!!!
Okay. Maybe you're not as excited as I seem to be, with my unending lifetime supply of exclamation points.

But I am very much anticipating visiting your blog, reading the story of how you met God and being encouraged.

All three of you.

Please click here if you'd like to read what "Tell Me Your Story" is all about. I'd love for you to join in by linking your blog to this one and posting your own story. (Mr Linky widget follows. KC of Mindless Chatter of a Busy Mom gets all the props for fitting me onto her white board calendar and sending me understandable instructions for Mr Linky. You ROCK!)

***Be sure to leave a comment for the bloggers you visit. They'd love to hear from you.***

Following is my "God story."(originally written 1/08):
"What's the best present you ever received?"

This common, ice-breaker question was asked of me recently and I knew immediately what I wanted to say, but I didn't say it. The setting was a light-hearted gathering and everything was , well, light-hearted. And I wanted to keep it like that. Because if I answered honestly what the best gift I ever received was, I would be weeping before a word got out of my mouth.


And I, my friends, am an ugly crier.


The best gift I ever received was the forgiveness of my sins and the promise of eternal life with the Father who loves me beyond reason.


I know. Just about everyone we know can say that, and it's the truth.

But the thing is, I don't deserve it. I really don't deserve it, and the fact that innocent, omnipotent, precious Jesus suffered and died for me, is absolutely ludicrous.


Because I murdered two of my own children.
(Don't think I'm being dramatic or over-the-top when I use the word "murder." I think not using it is what has helped get our society into this mess) I deserve to suffer and die. I deserve eternal hell apart from everything that is lovely, beautiful and good. The least I deserve is prison time in a small cell somewhere.





Oh, I repented.Repented is hardly a big enough word, but I don't know a better one. I regretted. I would eagerly give my life to change places with those children. I have been literally wracked by guilt and grief because of my selfish, cruel, thoughtless horrible decision to end the lives of my two babies by abortion. Nothing I can do will ever take away the grief of not knowing these children during my lifetime. Sometimes I look at Josiah or Amy and my heart just breaks into quarters. There was no where I could turn that would relieve me of the massive pain and life-swallowing shame.




But do you know what God did? He counted my tears and saved them in a bottle. He comforted me. He rejoiced over me with singing.He lifted my head. He welcomed me when I came to him.


It makes me shake my head in utter disbelief. Here I was, the most undeserving person on the planet, not worthy to raise my head in praise of him, uncomfortable in my own sick, sinful skin.

But he never left me. He sent his only son to suffer and die in my place so I could spend eternity with him, the Father who adopted me into his family. As one of his beloved children. He forgave me.
He loved me.



Unbelievable grace.



Scandalous, undeserved mercy.
It gives me goosebumps to think about it.



Today is the anniversary of Roe vs Wade, the decision that made my horrible decision easier for me and thousands like me.

Women are continuing to kill their own children everyday (45 million since 1973) and ruining their own lives in the process.

I volunteer in a women's prison and sometimes help lead a HEART (Healing and Encouragement for Abortion Related Trauma) bible study there. This article was sent to me by our local HEART leaders today and it shows very clearly how guilt-ridden women who have had abortion are, even decades afterwards.


If you want to read more about my testimony you can go here, to the Eternal Perspectives Ministries website. This is Randy Alcorn's ministry and you can find answers to so many questions you may have about a variety of subjects pertaining to abortion as well as Heaven, the persecuted church, money issues, grace and truth etc. Truly an excellent site. You can also find out more about his books such as Heaven or Safely Home to name just a couple.


On a personal note, Randy and Nanci are very good friends of mine, as it was through them that God rescued me. Not many people invite a complete stranger into their house to live, and then find out she is not only homeless, but pregnant. I cannot say enough about their love and graciousness.



I have found Jesus to be the only forgiver of sins, the only way to eternal life and honestly, the best present I ever received.


Next time, I'll post a blog about something frivolous again, like my hair troubles (and believe me, they are many) or a recipe for chicken and dumplings or pot roast. But today this needed to be said and my children needed to be remembered, as do all of them. Not as faceless potential people, but as dearly loved, missing sons and daughters.



This is what the LORD says: "A voice is heard in Ramah, mourning and great weeping, Rachel weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted, because her children are no more." Jer 31:15


The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." Zeph. 3:17






20 comments:

Amy Beth @ Ministry So Fabulous! said...

This is so incredible... I am so glad you shared.

His Girl said...

beautiful, lovely, precious story. When Good triumphs over Evil, it's always a reason to celebrate! Satan would have that you would be too ashamed to tell about the miracle of your Salvation- good for you for telling it anyway!Glory to God!

Jenn @ Casa de Castro said...

Loved reading your story (again) as well as the others linked here. Great idea. Thanks for the blessing!

Christa said...

I'm glad today is finally here just for your bloggy carnival. I told my husband about it a few days ago and we were both so excited. Many of my readers are unsaved family members, so this could be a way God speaks to them. Thanks for the opportunity!

Stacey said...

what a cool idea. Being the church, sharing God's love and connecting through the internet. It is a cool world we live in! Amazing story. Thank you for sharing and encouraging us all to share our testimony.

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

What a testimony to the "scandalous" grace of God--we are all so undeserving, but I understand your heart-wrenching regret and amazement at his ... amazing grace. Your story is humbling to read, is a wake-up call, is a psalm of praise.

Stacey said...

I have now posted my testimony.. thank you for the opportunity to witness to so many!!

Anonymous said...

I loved reading your testimony again. Jesus is the best gift we can receive. Thanks for hosting this bloggy carnival. I'm happy to share my testimony on my blog again. :)

Sheryl said...

Diane,
Thank you for your comments on my blog. I desperately need your prayers, so I appreciate that.

I began wondering how you found my blog and then I came here. I know it was the Lord that ultimately sent you. I have been reading many of your posts and will be back to read more.

You are amazing,
Sheryl

Paula V said...

Diane,
I came here to thank you for visiting my blog and for the nice comments about my title and photo. However, I read your latest post on your testimony. Wow! How absolutely beautiful of a testimony. God indeed is very loving, forgiving, and gracious to us when we do not deserve it.
God Bless your sweet soul.
Paula

Lylah Ledner said...

hi diane . . . great blog....love it...and thanks for your post on my lylah blog...the burts bees is fabulous for the price...really!

blessings...lylah

Anonymous said...

I am so in awe of our great Savior, Jesus Christ. His redemptive power, His grace, mercy, and love.
Thank you for sharing your story with us. I know it will touch many hearts and lives.

KC said...

What a beautiful post.. What an amazeing loving Savior we serve..
I haven't had a moment break yet to get a post up and posted yet.. but I'll work on it tonight if I can. Then I'll be back to link up..
Thanks for the linky love..
I'll be back..

KC said...

Mine is up and ready now..

Heather said...

Thank you for hosting this and for sharing your story. I love to hear how the Lord brings his children to him, whether it be as a young child or through a life changing event, it is all amazing and wonderful!! I gave mine for the first time last year, I may pull that out and post as well.

God Bless You!

Wendy said...

Diane, dear, you are such an awesome picture of God's grace and love. You really are.

Thank you for your bravery, honesty, and your caring heart. Not every woman would have the courage to tell their story. Thank you for telling yours.

Keri said...

I guess I'm linking to you- even though I'm kinda terrified to do it. What can I say, you've inspired me.

~Keri

Amy Plumb said...

I remember the first time I read this, it moved me so much. Such an incredible testimony.
Amy

Diane said...

Diane,
I am so happy to have found your blog. It was a beautiful testimony. God is good!

I will look forward to reading your posts daily! ...and invite you to visit mine.

Hugs...from another Diane!

Cariluz and Ike said...

Oh my goodness....your testimony gave me such chills. It may sound odd, but there is such relief for me in knowing that there are others out there who have experienced some of things I have in my life. It never fails to amaze me how God can inspire others to share something right when I need to hear it. Maybe I will even get brave enough to post my story, too!