Baloney Sandwich: Redux

***I looked back on my blog a year and a day ago and found this. I noticed that I am not feeling all thankful and grateful like I was that morning.

But I heart the Baloney Sandwich story, so I am repeating it.
I can do this.
This is my blog.
Have a good day.




This is just one of those thankful kind of days. Nothing special happened, but I am overwhelmed with gratefulness to God for everything He provides. Nice weather, jobs for our business, watermelon, the birds singing, tough lessons that He helps me learn, family, friends, DVR technology, beef on the grill.In all honesty, my list could go on and on. Couldn't yours?

Here is a very cool little devotional called "A Baloney Sandwich" from the book "Stories Bob Benson Used to Tell."

Read it. Enjoy it. Be thankful to God this morning.
Realize that I typed it up for you with my two-fingered typing skillz. Because I love you.

A Baloney Sandwich

"You have come to share in the very being of God" 2nd Peter 1:4

"Do you remember when they had old fashioned Sunday School picnics? I do. As I recall, it was back in the "Olden days", as my kids would say, back before they had air conditioning.They said, "We'll all meet at the Sycamore Lodge in Shelby Park at 4:30 on Saturday.

You bring your supper and we'll furnish the iced tea.



But if you were like me, you came home at the last minute. When you got ready to pack your picnic, all you could find in the refrigerator was one piece of dried up baloney and just enough mustard at the bottom of the jar so you got it all over your knuckles trying to get to it. And just two slices of stale bread to go with it. So you made your baloney sandwich and wrapped it in an old brown bag and went to the picnic.



When it came time to eat you sat at the end of a table and spread out your sandwich. But the folks who sat next to you brought a feast. The lady was a good cook and had worked hard all day to get ready for the picnic. And she had fried chicken and baked beans and potato salad and homemade rolls and sliced tomatoes and pickles and olives and celery.

And two big homemade chocolate pies to top it off. That's what they spread out there next to you while you sat with your baloney sandwich.

But they said to you,

"Why don't we just put it all together?""No, I couldn't do that. I couldn't even think of it," you murmured in embarrassment, with one eye on the chicken."Oh, come on, there's plenty of chicken and plenty of pie and plenty of everything. And we just love baloney sandwiches. Let's just put it all together."




And so you did and there you sat, eating like a king when you came like a pauper.








One day, it dawned on me that God has been saying just that sort of thing to me. "Why don't you take what you have and what you are, and I will take what I have and what I am, and we'll share it together?"


I began to see that when I put what I had and was and am and hope to be with what He is, I had stumbled upon the bargain of a lifetime.I get to thinking sometimes, thinking of me sharing with God. when I think of how little I bring, and how much He brings and invites me to share, I know I should be shouting from the housetops, but I am so filled with awe and wonder that I can hardly speak.



I know I don't have enough love or faith or grace or mercy or wisdom, but He does. He has all those things in abundance and He says, "Let's just put it all together."Consecration, denial,sacrifice,commitment and crosses were all kind of hard words for me, until I saw them in the light of sharing.



It isn't a case of me kicking in what I have because God is the biggest kid on the block and He wants it all for Himself. He is saying,"Everything I possess is available to you. Everything that I am and can be to a person, I will be to you."



When I think about it like that,it really amuses me to see somebody running along through life hanging on to their dumb bag with that stale baloney sandwich in it saying, "God's not going to get my sandwich! No sirree, this is mine!" Did you ever see anybody like that-so needy- just about half starved to death, yet hanging on for dear life. It's not that God wants your sandwich.

The fact is you need His chicken!

Well, go ahead-eat your baloney sandwich, as long as you can. But when you can't stand its tastelessness or drabness any longer, when you get so tired of running your own life and doing it your way and figuring out the answers with no one to help, when trying to accumulate,hold,grasp and keep everything together in your own strength gets to be too big a load, when you begin to realize that by yourself you're never going to be able to fulfill your dreams, I hope you'll remember that it doesn't have to be that way.


You have been invited to something better, you know. You have been invited to share in the very being of God.

Spiritualizing stuff

"Do you have to try to spiritualize everything?" or "Quit trying to spiritualize everything."



Both of these things have been said to me on more than a few occasions and it wouldn't bother me a bit if they were said by unbelievers.(And they have been)

But the times it has made me pause has been when it has been said by believers; people who have been Christians for a long time, usually raised in the church.


I always assumed people are kidding when they say this...until I'd heard it many times, and not always directed at me.

So I now have to ponder if what was said wrong, or wonder if intentions were misconstrued or I was so out of line that someone would feel they need to gently or jokingly correct me with a wink and a laugh.


I honestly can't see it.



If I were attempting to shove the Good News down some one's throat with a pitchfork or Bible-verse hurling with intent to injure I can see anyone getting annoyed. (including me)



But seeing God revealed in every situation or circumstance is not really a bad thing, in my opinion. In fact, its a good thing.

The way I see it, I don't put God in situations; He is already there.

I just see Him there and say something about it. I am not "trying" to make Him there...He just IS.

He encompasses everything, all the time.

"It is finished. I am the Alpha and the Omega-the Beginning and the End." (Rev.21:6)

God is not at all confined to church-flavored situations like Sunday School or communion or bible study, although He is there, too.

But He can be found in every detail, every action, every corner of creation.

He is the God of grapes and goats and galaxies. I want to see Him everywhere. Shouldn't we be asking Him to reveal His awesome presence to us...everywhere and in everything?

Aren't we admonished from the pulpit that we should not restrict our worship to Sundays while singing a Chris Tomlin worship song , but be aware of Him during conversations with family and friends, shopping at Safeway in the middle of the week,walking the goats or cleaning the kitchen after dinner?

So I would encourage you not to muffle or discourage the voices that see God everywhere. They are praising God when they recognize Him in the magnificent as well as the minuscule and mundane.

I would question whether some brothers and sisters are trying to impose limits on when and where God may be seen by His children, instead of inviting Him to make Himself known in everyday life.

I will continue find great joy in seeing Him everywhere, like a cosmic Where's Waldo. And speak up about it.

I am not spiritualizing everything.

He already did.

Right at the crest, where Mount Olives begins its descent, the whole crowd of disciples burst into enthusiastic praise over all the mighty works they had witnessed: Blessed is he who comes, the king in God's name! All's well in heaven! Glory in the high places!

Some Pharisees from the crowd told him, "Teacher, get your disciples under control!"

But he said, "If they kept quiet, the stones would do it for them, shouting praise." (Luke 19:38-40)

Psalm 148
Praise the Lord!

Praise the Lord from the heavens! Praise him from the skies! Praise him, all his angels! Praise him, all the armies of heaven! Praise him, sun and moon! Praise him, all you twinkling stars!

Praise him, skies above! Praise him, vapors high above the clouds! Let every created thing give praise to the Lord, for he issued his command, and they came into being. He set them in place forever and ever. His decree will never be revoked.

Praise the Lord from the earth, you creatures of the ocean depths, fire and hail, snow and clouds, wind and weather that obey him, mountains and all hills, fruit trees and all cedars, wild animals and all livestock, small scurrying animals and birds, kings of the earth and all people, rulers and judges of the earth, young men and young women, old men and children.

Let them all praise the name of the Lord. For his name is very great; his glory towers over the earth and heaven! 14 He has made his people strong, honoring his faithful ones— the people of Israel who are close to him.
Praise the Lord!

A hypothetical, slightly inappropriate situation

***You were warned once. I'm not gonna do it again. Proceed at your own risk.***

I was pondering things this morning as I jogged. About how I didn't feel like running. At all. About how excited I am that the new Glory Revealed CD is going to drop any minute now. About how happy I am that no goats are with me. About how that last insect I inhaled almost choked me to death.

Also about this following, completely hypothetical situation.



Picture this.



Say a wife is making dinner and folding laundry at the same time. Multi-tasking like a hurricane. She is on a mission to get things done. It is a Monday and things will get accomplished.



Suddenly, she realizes she has to go to the bathroom, but because she was like a woman on fire getting chores done, she may have waited a moment or two longer than she should have.

She rushes into the bathroom.



IF her husband had left the seat in the DOWN position, like he usually does, everything would be hunky-dory. Left with the seat in the upright position the humble toilet becomes a veritable Porcelain Death Trap for women, with it's gaping jaws and rushing waters.



So, for the sake of our story, let's just say that the husband left the seat up. Then the poor, unsuspecting wife would probably almost fall into the toilet and wheel her arms around like a big, clumsy ostrich trying to take flight. She may or may not have screamed.

Loudly.

She probably even pulled every muscle in her back, shoulder and neck.



But her injury would obviously be more than physical. It would be mental, too, because hell0-ooo.

She almost drowned in a toilet.



She would probably be justifiably miffed. I assume that she would not have the best attitude as she slapped said husband's Honey Mustard Roast Pork, steamed green beans and Garlic Parmesan red potatoes on a plate at dinner time.



You can't blame this pretend woman for getting upset. She most likely wouldn't even feel like running the next day.

Because of the pain, you know.

But she is a determined sort, (anger is an excellent motivator) and would probably go on her run anyway .

She would probably try to distract herself from the discomfort in her back by thinking about the new Glory Revealed CD that is going to drop any minute....

The Homely Goat

To be perfectly frank, he is rather ugly. Even for a goat. Rod brought the three month old Ringo home for a couple for a couple of reasons.

1. As a friend for Radar, Rod's beloved (yes, beloved) little, bottle-fed, adorable Alpine goat. Goats need company. Or they can get depressed and die. That would be sad.

2. Rod wanted to see what a La Mancha goat would be like. They are a breed which originated in Oregon (like La Marion berry), have no ears to speak of and are reputed to be the most lovable and affectionate of goats.

If "lovable and affectionate" can be read as "extremely needy and the noisiest goat EVER," then yes, I would have to enthusiastically agree.

Ringo bawls for hours in his nice warm and cozy stall. His wail can travel through closed doors and windows for miles. Reader Brenda can verify this fact.

He bawled like a baby crying for his mother for days. He lost his voice and then sounded like a goose with a pneumonia . It was awful. You mothers know how you feel when you hear a baby crying like that. You want to fix it. Fix it now. Comfort the little baby.

So we did. We would go out and hold him and comfort him. This is hard because he looks like an alien goat. Well, what an alien would look like if a planet of goat-like beings invaded Earth. Because he has no ears.

Are you frightened yet? You should see him when he bolts across the yard, full goat speed, and leaps at you. That is scary, my friends. SCARY.

But I am trying hard to love him, no matter that he is strange and different looking. As my daughter pointed out, I am always for the under-dog. Or under-goat, as the case may be. If that is true, then I should be wildly in love with this little guy. No matter that he bawls like a wounded elephant, or that he has chewed my Floribunda rose bush into a pile of thorny, flowerless twigs, or poops (BIG poop, I might add) on my front porch, or chases our cars down the driveway if one of us should ever leave or that he focuses his eyes directly on us in a freakishly disturbing manner.Or even that he smells kind of goaty.

He is still a creature that we need to care for. And we will look past his odd exterior into his little goat heart and love him anyway. Because he loves us. Well, he needs us, anyway.

I hope that God looks past my frumpy, not in perfect shape exterior and loves me anyway. Basically, I am a homely goat, too. (get off your high horse, you are,too) All needy and getting into trouble. But I'll follow Ringo's example here and bawl out my needs,stare directly at Him and race as fast as I can straight Jesus.

I love, love, LOVE how God uses all His creation to point to Himself. If we'll just look, there He is, all around us. All the time. Thank you so much, Lord.

My bloggy friend, Bev, (or as I call her "Crazy Chicken Lady") is catching the farmy flu, as well. Stop by and say "Howdy" to her. Because that is how we farm folk greet each other.

Here I am lovingly comforting poor little Ringo. You can see the special bond we share.
Please pray for us.

Oh, no she didn't!

Yesterday:

7:00am:Plain Cheerios and skim milk for breakfast.

10:00am: Cleaned stalls and helped Rod clean barn. Worked hard.

11:00: Walked dogs and puppy-goat for an easy mile or so.

12:00pm: Lunched on tuna and mustard on a thin slice of whole wheat. 10 almonds. Cheese stick. Carrots.

1:00pm: Hiked alongside an energetic and slightly mischievous 2 year old horse for more than four miles. Sweat alot.

5:00pm: Rod left to watch Lakers on TV with his Dad and Josiah. I ate tomato soup and 12 Reduced Fat Ritz crackers. (Yes, I'm counting.)

9:30pm: I woke up because I heard Rod arrive home and calling out: "Anybody want some leftover chocolate birthday cake?"

9:31pm: Moving into the kitchen and reaching for a fork before my body even knows I am out of bed. I am a Chocolate Cake Ninja.

9:33pm: Back to bed. I'm exhausted. And full. And happy.

(the second fork is Amy's, my partner in crime who also woke up like the Dawn of the Dead Cake Zombi and helped make the dessert disappear.)

Goat Science

Owning a baby goat is a science. A BOTTLE-FED baby goat.

It seems like it should be easy. It is livestock. Any farmer can do it.

But we worry about little Radar.

Is he eating enough? Is he eating too much?

Is he acting lively enough?

Is he too lethargic?

Do we need to give him another baby goat enema. (yes, you read that correctly. Just keep on reading and try to forget.That's what I'm going to do.)

Maybe your first question, when you are finished laughing, is: Why did Rod and Diane get a goat? And I'm not gonna lie. There is a small part of me that is slightly embarrassed by the fact that we own a goat. That is probably why I usually refer to him a the "puppy-goat."

I guess I have a certain type of person in mind when I think of people who own goats. I need to get over my biases. So do you.

But you bring up an excellent question. Direct and to the point. Let me pull this strand of hay out of my mouth and hitch up my overalls and give you the short answer.

Because Rod wants to raise a "packgoat."

I went along with the plan as soon as I figured out it had nothing to do with a "packrat." We already have one of those, and his initials start with ROD. Just sayin'.

A packgoat, for those of you not up on your goat science, is a goat that carries or packs your things into or out of camp. Or on a backbacking/camping trip. Gosh, it sounds like a good time.

As I don't camp without an RV or a resort nearby, I say, "Have a merry,good time, Rod and fellow goatpackers. (I wonder if this is like that time he joined the Civil War Cavalry? He and his horse, Eli went to battle a few times before Eli became terrified of the cannon blasts and Rod figured out that those Cavalry guys take their play-acting pretty seriously. Shhhh....don't tell them the War is O.V.E.R.)

Anyway, our baby goat is adorable and follows Rod everywhere he goes. I did put my foot down when Rod picked him up last night and began to put him in our bed. He thought I was asleep.. I was not.

Here is the puppy-goat having morning devotional with Papa-Goat Rod.

He seems pretty intelligent,is not noisy and does not eat too much. Check back with me in a year or two.

I am completely fascinated by watching him. He has a beautiful pattern on his fur....hair? Beautiful eyes that seem to be able to communicate. A funny personality.

I can't help but wonder what God was thinking about as He created goats. Seriously.

Their little cloven hooves that help them balance on slippery rocks, their bleating cry, their horns.

It does just make me praise God for his creativity and his kindness in giving us people these marvelous gifts.

But as much as there is to study about Goat Science, and there is A LOT to learn, there is an endless amount to learn about our God.

I think about all the things He has made, and how we can study them and become, you know, Goat Masters, or Doctors of Goat Science, or of any of the other kajillion things He has created and I am humbled.

Now I am adding is a Charles Spurgeon quote here because it fits, and I don't want to hear any mocking about adding him onto a goat post. Just read it and shush.

He says,

"The proper study of the Christian is the Godhead. The highest science, the loftiest speculation, the mightiest philosophy which can engage the attention of the child of God is the name, the nature, the person, the doings, the existence of the great God...There is something exceedingly improving to the mind in a contemplation of divinity. It is a subject so vast, that all our tools are lost in its immensity; so deep that our pride is drowned in its infinity. Other subjects we can comprehend and grapple with; in them we feel a kind of self-contentment, and go our way with the thought, "Behold, I am wise." But when we come to this master science, finding that our plumb-line cannot sound its depth, and that our eagle-eye cannot see its height, we turn away with the thought, I am but of yesterday, and know nothing."

Yeah. What he said.

We laugh. We cry. And there's a Give-Away!

This is my second attempt at writing this post. The first one began innocuously enough giving you information about an upcoming cover story in the May/June issue of Bible Study Magazine about one of my favorite people, Randy Alcorn.



The article focuses on Randy's approach to bible study as well as writing, so naturally,I was very interested to see what they wrote.
I also visited Bible Study Magazine website and found out a little bit about their magazine. It honestly sounds phenomenal and something I am thinking of subscribing to.
The story on Randy is great and he opens up about his thoughts on writing fiction.
“One of the reasons I love writing fiction is that
it can help readers open up the gates of their
minds. Through good fiction that contains
biblical truth, both non-Christian and Christian
readers, who may not believe in certain things
the Bible teaches, can discover truth.” Randy says in the article.
He goes on the explore what his bible study habits are.

See? All this is good and interesting stuff. I know I'd like to read more of that article.

But as I'm writing my blog about Randy and this story, slowly I'm sliding from nicely informational post to scary,emotional post and I'm becoming a bloggy pool of sentimentality, weeping as I type.
Maybe I don't carry it quite that far, but you get the picture. And it isn't pretty.





Because when I think of Randy and his wife Nanci I cannot help but gratefully think of who they have been to me. I am pausing here to think best how to put this so I don't overstate it...





They pretty much rescued me the same as you would rescue someone from, you know, a BURNING BUILDING or a RAGING FLOOD.





They were were JESUS WITH SKIN ON. Oh, yes they were.





They housed me, clothed me, fed me, attempted to discipline me, loved me anyway, were SO THERE for me in every way a person can be there for another person.You seriously have NO idea. They introduced me to their church family where I have been ever since.


They introduced me to JESUS and HOPE and ETERNAL LIFE....and my HUSBAND.





No, I was not a part of Randy's and Nanci's family. They were not obligated to help me, to rescue me. No one paid them to take care of me.


Who does that?





They did.


Un-stinkin'-believable.





Can you say GRATEFUL?


I can.


But not without choking up.









So, all that heartfelt, but mindless gushing to say that you should all go get the May/June issue of Bible Study Magazine, (doesn't the name of the magazine just make you want to subscribe? Me,too!) and enjoy the cover story about my friend, Randy. (Yes, he talks about Nanci in the article, too!)


Also, Bible Study Magazine is teaming up with Randy's Eternal Perspectives Ministries to give away 40 copies of "Heaven." Click here to enter the drawing.


Here is a brief blurb about this oh-so excellent book:









"In the most comprehensive and definitive book on Heaven to date, Randy invites you to picture Heaven the way Scripture describes it¿a bright, vibrant, and physical New Earth, free from sin, suffering, and death, and brimming with Christ's presence, wondrous natural beauty, and the richness of human culture as God intended it.






God has put eternity in our hearts.







Now, Randy Alcorn brings eternity to light in a way that will surprise you, spark your imagination, and change how you live today. If you've always thought of Heaven as a realm of disembodied spirits, clouds, and eternal harp strumming, you're in for a wonderful surprise.




This is a book about real people with real bodies enjoying close relationships with God and each other, eating, drinking, working, playing, traveling, worshiping, and discovering on a New Earth. Earth as God created it. Earth as he intended it to be. "



Don't ya want to read more? Me, too! (We are so much alike!) So go enter the drawing to win it.
Randy has done all the studying and reading and research and praying so we can benefit from his knowledge on this subject. You will come away changed.

Randy and Nanci helped change the course of my life. I will always be grateful and always love them both.

I think of how, when I had no family God provided them for me. I will always be just wreaked and broken by the love God showered on me when I so completely deserved the opposite and by the Alcorn's extraordinary example of commitment and grace.

In the years since I lived there, we've shared alot of life's "stuff" from weddings, work, potlucks, church stuff, speaking thingys (engagements sounds too serious and professional), mole-throwing, all things doggy, family stuff and on and on.

There have been more crying times than we wanted. Lots of praying times.

But mostly, when I think of my friends Randy and Nanci, I remember laughing.

Usually at them.

But lots of times with them, too. :-)

***Congratulations to Randy for getting the last of his revisions for his latest book into his editor today!! Yay, you're done!!! Woo hoo!!!

Birthday Wrap-Up

Yeah. I know. My birthday seems to have stretched on for an eternity this year. I am even tired of all the hoopla.
But, I promise. This is it. The end of the celebrations.
The crew and I went to a weekend of Beth Moore wonderfulness.
I am feeling a bit under the weather so I will not be blogging about the conference today. You may be thankful for this, I don't know. But I did take these pictures. And I tried to keep the text to six words as that was my assignment, both at the conference and when I was putting the pictures together. (Thanks,Jen.)
Enjoy with my blessings.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

B-Day Extravaganza!!

I am not usually one to toot my own horn.

One, because I am not musical. At all. It would not be a joyful noise unto the Lord.

Two, because I like to be all subtle when bragging on myself, so you're not quite sure that is what I am doing. Then you start to question yourself and your motives rather than me and my bragasaurous ways. That's the way I like it. Uh-huh.

But I just have to boast to you about my fabulous birthday week.

It all began with going over to Ashley's apartment. (Ashley being Josiah's girlfriend. Please try to keep up.) She wanted to make a birthday dinner for me. During the week, she sent me this email:

"Hey Diane I was just wondering what thought you might like for dinner on Wednesday and what your favorite kind of cake was?"

FYI: we are keeping Ashley, so please stop sending pictures and vital statistics of your sons, nephews and brothers.

We had a fantastic dinner of chicken enchiladas, corn and chocolate birthday cake. This was topped off with taste testing jelly-bellys with flavors like pencil shavings, earwax or vomit.

Seriously. Oh my goodness. The laughing interspersed with the gagging. It was priceless. The truly hysterical part was when you didn't know if your white jelly belly was coconut or.....baby wipe. Or if the light brown candy was coffee flavored or....wait for it....ear wax.

Oh the joy of seeing Rod tasting baby wipes. It brings tears to the eyes, I tell you.

(Ashley, Amy and Josiah watch Rod as he spits out the really disgusting jelly bellys, which he insisted was dog poo. It wasn't. But it might as well have been.)

We ended the evening watching American Idol together singing and dancing along. And mocking Paula's bent-back fingers hand clapping. Fun was had by all.

Then, last night, Rod took me out for a birthday dinner-and-a-movie date. Although someone did ask to come with us (I won't mention his name but his initials are Josiah) we decided some quiet time would be nice. And it was. Not a jelly belly in sight.

So now we come to the Birthday Extravaganza Weekend!!! Guess who is coming to help celebrate ? I'll give you a hint....she has exquisite hair....she is the Mama Siesta....

Can someone say "birthday exuberance?"

I KNOW!!! I am very excited to say the least. To be completely honest, Beth Moore is not actually aware that it is my birthday we are celebrating this weekend in Portland. She probably pretty much for sure does not know I exist. But I am so much looking forward to spending the weekend at the LPM conference in Portland with my crew.

To wrap it all up in a ginormous bow, Brenda, Jen and I are going to eat at the Melting Pot on Saturday where we will dip all manner of food into a fondue pot and eat ourselves into sweet oblivion.

There you have it. Pretty much the best birthday week. Ever.

PS. Thank you to my Facebook and Bloggy friends who have stopped by to say Happy Birthday to me. You are all more than I deserve. Love you!

Next week: Back to reality. I'm ready.