Wednesday, July 16, 2014

One thing leads to another

Rod came out of our bathroom yesterday and began giving me an encouraging pep-talk.
"We need to be patient and not lose our tempers with each-other. We're in this for the long haul. We just need to stay positive and cheerful. And kind."

First off, I have no idea what he is talking about.
Second, why do I get the feeling he is really talking about me, not "us"?

"Um, what is going on?" I asked.

"Well, you know how we have been noticing the shower floor getting saggy?"

Of course I noticed that. I'd been working on ignoring that for almost a year. Making excuses like, maybe I've gained more weight than I'd thought. Maybe I have an inner ear infection and it is making me all wobbly and dizzy.  If all else failed, I just sang "LA LA LA-la la LA LA!" with my fingers both covering my eyes and plugging my ears.

"No. What are you even talking about?"

Then he opened the door to the master bathroom.
Just to clarify, I used to have a shower and a whirlpool bathtub right there.
Look, you can see my peony bush out through that hole in the wall. Why does that look like a cat door? I don't even have a cat.
Well.
Apparently we are having an unexpected remodeling project to do this month.

Oh, and Rod informed me that the wall and floor leading into my bedroom have also been destroyed by the Black Death Mold and we will need to replace those as well.

Did you know that my bedroom floor goes ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE ROOM and therefore my ENTIRE ROOM AND BATHROOM NEED TO BE DEMOLISHED AND REDONE?

I'm very sorry to shout, but I am trying to hear through my own "LA LA LA LA la la la la LA LA's."

So, if any of you has any great bathroom or bedroom ideas please send them my way. Because I do not day dream of redecorating. No, this is the stuff my nightmares are made of. This is not my gifting.
I have had to start looking at ideas on Pinterest.
Oh, the horror!
On the bright side, I can demolish.
Look, here is my back deck where all my bathroom stuff now resides until we can load it up and make a happy trip to the dump.
What a welcoming retreat!
 If you notice other things among the bathroom stuff, that is because I needed to clear some stuff out of our spare room so I could make space for all the things I will need to store there while we UNEXPECTEDLY TEAR APART MY BATHROOM AND BEDROOM.
LALALALALALALALALALA!!!!

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