Monday, January 12, 2009

Do I Google you? Let me count the ways...

"John 3:16" was the scripture inscribed in the black under Gator QB Tim Tebow's eyes during the BCS National Championship game.

And, just like that, the biblical reference became the most popular search item on

Google Trends on the morning after the game had "John 3:16" ahead of searches for American Idol and even the Windows 7 beta download. Searches for the Bible verse reached a peak during the game.

This leads me to make some profound observations and ask some tough questions.

1) Tim Tebow rocks. You know he does, John Lewis, you Face Book trash-talker.

2)Google has forever changed the way we gather information. Did you notice it is used as a verb now?How did that happen?

How many times does a word have to be used by the general public before it is accepted by Websters or who ever is is charge of New Word Usage?

3) How heartwarming it is that a young home-schooled, missionary kid can have such drive and passion for the Lord, and accomplish so much with his talent and fame? (Answer:Very.)

4) It also begs the question: What else do people Google for? I wonder how those people in India and Toronto find "Meyers on the Hood"? (And a big shout-out to the person who found me all the way from Poznan Wielkopolskie Poland. I can't pronounce the name of your city, but you all have a pretty flag. Holla!)

Well, I can answer that burning question so you can rest easily and sleep like a baby tonight.

These are the actual queries that people typed into Google. They were then directed to my site by the search engine. Yes, ma'am,

"Speed demon: a Chopper profile" Google directed them to the post that included this picture:

I have no idea what they were searching the internet for, but I'm sure they were thrilled with what Google handed them.

Then there was the person who asked Google this: "How can I get super speed?" (if you see someone zipping around like monkeys on high octane crack, you know they found their answer.)

Because I write about God in my everyday life I have quite a few poor people who are directed to my blog when they type things like this in the Google bar:

"Breathe in breathe out get knocked out" (Really?)

" I get low down but I get up again " (Me,too, sister. Me,too.)

"I get knocked down in the bible" (Even in the Bible? That's getting low.)

"religious leaders:churches should be "nonjudgmental" about behavior that transmits hiv " (were they hoping to make a statement here?)

"god my life is in your hands I can't go on any longer "

I actually am very sad for the person who typed in that last statement and found themselves reading about my gray hair or Chicken Tortilla Soup on my blog. I am sorry.

The next little section I had to edit down because THERE WERE SO MANY. Everybody seems to have questions about their son's girlfriend and so obviously they need to talk to their son get some professional counseling GOOGLE IT.

Here are just a few of the people who have dropped out of the internet into my blog:

I don't like my son's girlfriend (I'm sorry.)

why my son's girlfriend doesn't want to visit our house. (She's just not that into you.)

my son never had a girlfriend. (Hmmmm.)

my son's girlfriend is a ___________.(yes. Somebody thought it'd do some good to type that into Google.)

Google was able to help at least one person when they pointed them to my site.

They typed in:

"pictures of the prettiest horses on earth" (I'm happy to oblige.)

Oh, and Tim Tebow rocks. Just wanted to say it again. Have a great day, amigas.

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